I posted yesterday evening about what was said at my appointment with the surgeon and what the plan is so far, but I wanted to post a little more on what I've been learning.  I got to thinking that a lot of people would not have done what I have done.  When diagnosed with cancer, you are scared.  There is no getting around that.  It's human.  You are overwhelmed by doctor's appointments and the information you get at each new appointment.  You know you should ask questions, but you don't know what to ask.  Even some doctors I've talked to have said they would recommend me having surgery even if I do nothing else conventional.  I have not done that.  I've waited 20 months to proceed with surgery.

Some would ask why I'm having surgery now when I didn't after I was first diagnosed.  The truth of the matter is God.  Twenty months ago when I was diagnosed I believed God was directing me to natural treatment.  I still believe today that He was doing that.  I believe He wanted my diet to change.  He wanted me to get off the sugar and Diet Cokes.  He wanted that for me, not for Him.  He was patient and waited for me to get to the place I needed to be.  Did I fail Him? Yes.  Many times.  I still do.  Has He failed me?  Never.  Not once.  I have seen my tumor grow to 1.9 cm.  I have also seen it shrink.  It's now 1.4 cm. Conventional medicine says that does not happen.  Conventional medicine says tumors grow.  It's what makes them malignant--this exponential growth.  Perhaps that's true.  I am no doctor.  I don't even claim to be that smart, but what I do know is that the tumor that was 1.9 cm is now 1.4 cm. 

When I reached out to the surgeon here, finally after a year a living in KY, I started praying.  I told the Lord I didn't want surgery, but I also asked Him to show me clearly if I was not to have surgery.  I have done this before in my life, and just as before He showed me again that the lumpectomy is His will for me now.  When the surgeon came in, unlike the previous one, he sat down and said, "You have two options, and the first one I wouldn't recommend.  You can have a mastectomy."  He explained that I am healthy with no other health issues that we are aware of.  He also mentioned the fact that the tumor is still small and not aggressive.  Then he said he is recommending a lumpectomy.  He was decisive in his recommendation.  I suppose there are people out there who would and do have mastectomies if there is the slightest indication of cancer, sometimes even if there isn't.  On the other hand, I prefer to keep as many and as much of my body parts as the Lord gave me.  God was clearly showing me that it is time for surgery.

Going forward, the doctor's recommendation is surgery, radiation, and hormone therapy.  At this point, surgery is what I know I will do.  I do not plan on doing radiation or hormone therapy unless the Lord shows me clearly that I need to do that, but as with this whole journey plans can change.  I am aware that surgery will, most likely, not get rid of all the cancer cells.  I am also aware that the cancer has a higher chance of coming back without the radiation, but I have had 20 months to consider this and I do not believe the benefits outweigh the risks at this point.

Next time I will post on some things that will not change because of my surgery and some things I've been doing that may, and depending on when I get a call about a surgery date and time I will of course post that as well.